Achieve Success, Cut Toxic People Out!
Achieve Success, Cut Toxic People Out!
Everyone is drawn to happy, successful, and emotionally grounded individuals. Most parents do their best to teach their children to set and respect their personal boundaries, to speak up for themselves firmly, and to carry themselves with class and confidence. However, we all know a highly talented person with the loveliest personality who can’t meet his or her full potential in their personal or professional lives due to a toxic relationship. They may have a boss, a coworker, a parent, a spouse, sibling or friend who drains, distracts, and/or intimidates them with destructively limiting consequences.
Perhaps you’re the victim of a toxic relationship being manipulated and/or guilt-tripped because, “She’s just going through a tough time”, or “He just needs some emotional support”. There are always times when we need to be there for the people we care about, but there are also times we must protect ourselves from the influence of their unhealthy behaviors. There are several strategies to identify and break away from toxic individuals. If any of these characteristics sound familiar to you, there may be a need to re-evaluate our social circles.
- Identify the toxic people
Some toxic people are well liked by acquaintances, as their bad behavior is only directed toward those in his or her immediate circle. Toxic people:
- Slander others
- Constantly talk about or complain about a specific person, group of people or you
- Do not care about your life or your problems
- Try to gain sympathy from others
- Vent, rant and rave to everyone who will listen
- Ostracize anyone who doesn’t agree with them
- Are blind to their bad behavior
- Don’t respect anyone’s opinion outside of their own
- Urge you to participate in conflicts
Anyone who can’t hold a conversation unless it’s negative and bitter should raise a red flag. These people will eventually repel and run off everyone close enough to get to know them.
- Deal with toxic people strategically
Regardless of the individual’s relationship to you, don’t encourage or enable the behavior by spending excessive amounts of time with them. Keep conversations with them very short and general, and don’t tell them personal details about your life as they will use the information as a weapon against you later. It’s okay to be compassionate, but keep your boundaries intact. Speak up, depersonalize their attacks, and never allow yourself to believe their behavior is normal or acceptable.
- Never take their behavior personally
Know that it is not you; they are the problem. Toxic people often manipulate others into thinking they have done something wrong as an attempt to control their victims through guilt and shaken confidence. Don’t allow yourself to be a victim, refuse to take anything they say personally. Toxic people behave negatively with everyone, so take their insults as a reflection of their character instead of yours. All of their negativity is their own self-reflection.
- Do not pretend their behavior is okay
Many people find themselves tip-toeing around toxic people to avoid or diffuse angry blow-ups and emotionally abusive character attacks. Constant drama and negativity is physically and emotionally draining, and should NEVER be tolerated.
- Replace them with new healthy friends
The key to maxing out your full potential in both your personal and professional life is surrounding yourself with a positive support system that helps make you better. Always gauge the quality of your company by how they make you feel.
Red Flags to Remember:
- Gossiping
- Judging
- Negativity
- Complaining
- Excuses
- Exaggerating
- Dogmatism
I would like to learn about your strategies for identifying and dealing with toxic and abusive people. SHARE your stories with me by posting your comments below this article in the space provided. We all have the same goal in mind, happiness and success, so let’s learn together.
EMAIL this to a friend while you still have your email box open.
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Don’t just keep this great information to yourself. There are others who can use this information to strive to reach success.
How can you improve your social environment?
With you all the way,
Courtney
